Sunday 14 June 2020

The Third Book The 15th Chapter - Discover Your Change


Discover Your Change
June 14, 2020
So, you have identified what you want to do in your life to live more fully. You've identified how and why you want to make changes. You are now taking baby steps and taking action. Now what? This is a brand new journey for you. Do you know if the “how, what, and why” the gift you have identified within yourself is truly making any difference?

I would like to share a story of my journey that started about three years ago when I wrote my first book. The “how” of how I wrote my first book and format remained similar as I wrote the following two books. Until this book, I knew my technical writing ability was novice. In the past, I had overlooked that because it was always something I truly wanted to do and truly wanted to share with others. I remember the first chapter I wrote was hardly a page and I had nothing more to write.  As I thought about this, I asked myself, “How am I supposed to fill all the empty pages of this book”? The strategy I developed was a simple goal to fill two pages at a time. By doing that, I was able to finish my first book called “Climb Your Mountain”.

I remember a sense of accomplishment, but also knew I could do so much better. How do you become better, you may ask? Practice, practice, practice, practice all with the foundation that is based on truth and integrity. Identify what you need to do to improve and listen to the feedback others provide. This is a slow process, but picture yourself gathering little golden Nuggets scattered through the years of your life. Meltdown and combine these little golden Nuggets that will allow you to provide the currency to grow your accomplishments. One of these small golden Nuggets was a story told by John Maxwell. He shared that his first book was made up of many short chapters and the reason it was made like that was that he had nothing more to give. He didn't know how to write; he didn't know how to make words flow; he didn't know how to make a complex idea sound easy and straightforward for the reader.

When I first started to write, I allowed myself to fool myself, saying that I strategically chose short chapters to engage new readers. I rationalized that people are often too busy to devote three to four hours a day to read a book and if they had three to five minutes, they could read one of my chapters. I now realize this was a lie I told myself in order to justify my short chapters. I would have been much better off at the time just to tell the truth. The truth was I didn't know what to write. The truth I was feeling overwhelmed. The truth I was feeling insecure. The truth that I wanted everybody to know I knew what I was doing. Unfortunately, in reality, I didn't. I did believe at the time I was doing my best and I did feel there was value in what I was writing, but it would have been better if I had just told the truth at the time. Wayne Gretzky didn't become a superstar in one day at the age of 18. He spent years of his life in the preparation of becoming one of the youngest professional hockey players. Once he got there, he didn't stop. He kept practicing, growing, and giving to others. Those actions combined, allowed him to become one of the all-time greatest professional hockey players. How often when we start something new, do we have an unrealistic expectation about the technical level we should achieve? How often do you lie to yourself that impacts how quickly you are able to grow?

My journey changed when I hit rock bottom. We all have different experiences when we hit rock bottom, but the impact is tremendous to each of us. My experience was after years of building a successful leadership career, I ran out of work. I was surrounded, and I'm still surrounded by an amazing, loving family, but my career had run out of steam. I had searched, applied, and refined my resume but did not receive one call back for a formal interview. I had spent hours and hours trying to move forward, but not one opportunity. I remember the warm day, last August, when I broke as if it only happened a few moments ago. I remember a sense of desperation, despair, low self-esteem, and a sense of utter uselessness. Quickly, that was replaced by a wave of anger that I had never previously felt. Questioning, “Why am I going through this experience? What have I done to deserve this experience? Haven't I worked hard enough to grow my skillset? Haven't I worked hard enough to raise my kids? Haven't I worked hard enough to provide value to others? So now, when I need the opportunity the most, how come I cannot catch a break?” I realized at that moment, I had to change. I had to do something different. I had to find a different way to build my strength.

I remember riding home that day in silence with the full realization I had a gift to change my life. It was sitting in front of me the entire time; the gift of a relationship with Christ. That gift was provided to me by my great friend and spiritual mentor, Mark. I had met Mark about 2 1/2 years ago at a John Maxwell training seminar. Since then, we have become close friends, and he has been coaching me for a year and a half now. He gave his gift freely many times, intending to serve me and for me to become a believer of Christ. There have been many occasions I have felt God speak directly to me through the words of Mark. It happened again the first time I spoke with him after hitting my rock bottom, and he asked me if I was ready. With tears in my eyes, I said yes, and he formally asked me to give my life to Christ. At first, I felt a little uncomfortable, followed quickly by this is the right thing to do, but I had no idea how to do it and how to measure it. I thought, “What do I do now? How do I go forward? How do I put this gift in my life to benefit others? How do I show others this is something different, this is something lasting?” I had this conversation with Mark on many occasions, now that I have this gift of Christ, what now? Once I allowed myself to let go of my ego, once I allowed myself to believe I didn't know how to do it on my own, it was OK. Once I allowed myself to believe in faith and that things would happen when they were meant to happen, things began to change.

Once I realized to turn to everlasting life, the momentum started to grow. So how do you know and how do you measure your change? Here is another story. For the first 2 1/2 years of my writing, once I posted it to my blog, I would share it with others. I would see a small number of views on my blog after I shared with others, but shortly after that, it would fizzle. Once in a while, there might have been a random view but overall, the pattern was the only time there was an increase in views was when I would actively push the blog. My thoughts went back to the story of Jesus and the woman at the well. Daily, I had to go back to the well to create hits to my blog; although that worked, it was very time consuming and not very sustaining. Then I recognized a change in this pattern once I started writing again after I found Christ. I still share new posts with family and friends, but things have shifted. I have noticed views are growing, not only on the day I post, but also on the following days. As I have watched this change occur, I have been fascinated; I don’t actively push the blog, and I asked myself, “why do I see new views?” Then I realized, the spirit is providing the momentum shift. The spirit is doing more than what I am able to do alone. There is a measure of change to my “how” and my “what” and that my “why's” are coming together one nugget at a time and beginning to move the momentum needle.

When you have hit your rock bottom and start moving your life to where you need to be, small changes begin to happen. Once you have discovered your change, you become more aware of where you need to be. You realize the first few steps, after pushing through your barrier fear, are in alignment with your goals. Then if you want to supersize your vision, add in the most powerful ingredient, that is Christ. Only then, will you see and feel how your change becomes more prominent than you are. This change will provide you with the strength that you have used to have to contribute to yourself. It will allow you to move faster and enable you to help others. You will be in awe. The discovery of change will allow you to move forward no matter the obstacle you face, no matter what social media barrage you may face. It will allow you to sift through the garbage, identify the truth, and see the golden Nuggets before you.

Now, more than before, and depending on where you are on your journey, is the time you need to make that conviction. Have you hit rock bottom? Have you started to make some changes? Have you started to discover some of those changes have moved your momentum? Right now, think of someone that is your “Mark” and I guarantee you this person is patiently waiting to give you the gift. It doesn't matter what you went through in the past, it only matters right now, and you are worthy of this gift of everlasting love.     

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