The 33rd Chapter - Allowing Randomness to Provide Value to You

Nov 5/16

As I am sitting in a large coffee chain location - I find my thoughts are all over the place and random.  I was going to write about a different topic - however this day has been one that had not turned out as planned.  Totally in a good way and filled with which appears to be random opportunities, that have came across my path today and they have altered my reality in a significant way.  Sometimes I start to question to why today seems and feels so different - which I would like to share.

I met up with an old colleague that I have not spent time with in a long while.  This person and I were also waiting for results on a submitted proposal to a third party for over four months now.  So what appears to be a random lunch meeting - maybe it was not?  One of the items discussed was I communicated I still have not heard any feedback from the proposal.  While I was sitting over lunch and having a conversation - I could feel my phone going off a few times.  As I related to in some of my previous chapters - time is truly a great gift - and to give your time to someone else, one should respect that person and this respect should also come back to you.  One way of ensuring I do that - I will ignore my cell phone while I am having a conversation with someone else.  As I feel it is disrespectful and it is another form of allowing interruptions with the precious time you are spending with someone.

After lunch was over and we had parted ways - I did check my phone and one of the messages waiting to be read was an email communicated that the proposal was accepted.  ( another colleague taught me the importance of putting aside my cell phone.  In my past as I was talking with people if my phone would go off, I will switch my attention to my phone and ignore the person.  He respectfully commented that perhaps I should mange my time in a different way - which I am so grateful he brought this up to me.  I also wanted to point out - the message was waiting - it was not going anywhere and that news would have no real impact waiting to read it. )  So all the months of waiting and at that particular moment news was received - was that random?  Ultimately it is you that had to decide that.  However my view is that it was not random and what that moment provided me was further fuel to propel me along the current path I am on.   The choices I am making are the ones that are aligning up to the path written by me for me.

This has also turned my thoughts to balance and the importance to have that.  It is important to allow life's randomness to provide you some kind of direction.  Like floating with a current in a stream - however there are times when the moment is right that you need to make some decisions and to not always allow the current to fully direct your life.  An example of that is your river might have a fork in it and  if you stay in it, it will take you over a deadly water fall.  Your survival instinct will kick in and intuitively you will know to paddle out of that current and go move your canoe to the opposite fork to avoid the fatal water falls.   By doing this it will allows you to continue to grow and be provided with the experience of a new part of the river.

When you are struggling the most of what direction you should take in life, take a breath, pause a moment and your inner self will provide you the direction.  You will have the knowledge in you to avoid the deadly forks and follow the ones that provide positive growth.

Use the natural energy around you to increase the joy of your life's journey.   The healthy river currents are waiting for you to propel you to your greatness.

The 32nd Chapter - Find Your Clarity

Oct 31/16

A moment of reflection to share.  It all ties into when you start making the small choices that align up with what you truly want.  It is almost magical that you will start to have more clarity - you will start feeling and knowing what your next steps need to be.  If these next steps are in alignment of what you truly want you should be starting to feel like your gaining energy from these choices or moments of clarity.

The next step will be to have the strength to make these changes.  In general we are typically comfortable in our current reality and although we may not be completely happy with ourselves or our current status quo.  We will remain there like the frog in the slowly warming water.  We know what to expect and that will provide us with a sense of stability of a known future.  However if your feeling a sense of being unsettled it is likely you might need to make some changes.  These changes can be small ones, like going for a walk or call a friend and share some new positive ideas or thoughts.  Or it might be a lot bigger like changing a relationship or even maybe a job or start a new career.

When you take a moment to think and feel you will know what choices you have to make.  Also when you decide to make a change to increase the value of how you feel in life.  Remember this journey of life is now new to you and you will make mistakes and you will want to go back to the before period.  However if you know your making the correct choices stay on this path of the new journey.

So specifically my reflection is - over the past year or so, I have made a few choices I knew and now know were not the correct ones for me.  As time went on of me making the incorrect choices I noticed some of my close friends drifted away and I did not spend as much time with family as I should have.  On a deeper level, over time, I slowly lost my clarity of who I am and what I truly wanted to accomplish in life.  It was as if I was lost in a cloud or was observing someone else's life and not my own.  My passion and uniqueness was discounted over that year by myself and my biggest learning from that year was not to allow others alter my own person of being.  Allowing my confidence to slip away to the put of was just left with going through the action of life and not truly living life.

If you are starting to feel this way or you can relate to some of this chapter and you are searching for some people and clarity.  I hope these words have provided some comfort and a start of how to tangible way to make some changes in your life.  Like the weight loss programs I wrote about earlier, start looking deeper into the whys of what is not working for you.  Once you have determined the why's you will be able to identify where you need to go.  It shouldn't matter what your spiritual or religious beliefs are, you are indeed allowed to feel joy in your life and that your quest is up to you to fill the the rest of the pages.

You have all the answers you need inside of you for you - the key is to find tools, reading, other positive people to talk to provide ways for you to unlock your next steps.  All of these resources come to you when you need them and the true sources of this gift,  will give it to you freely and as much as you need.  You will also start to have the sense the new choices you are making are the correct ones for you.

Start slowly with this exercise and only make decisions when you know your ready.  With anything you practice it will become easier and quicker to receive the clarity you are looking for.

Enjoy the beginnings of the new positive feelings of your hard work you have created.

The 31st Chapter - Find Your Passion - Repeat Your Passion

Oct 30/16

I feel compelled to write down some random thoughts.  As I am sitting here writing I can feel energy and thoughts coming from other people.  Also having the overwhelming feeling I know I am meant to be here right now and writing.  An old acquaintance walked into the store I am sitting in and the conversation turned to them going to Hawaii and specifically to the island of Oahu.  What a feeling to be aware and to be alive - the feeling of growth and confidence combined.

When I first started creating these writings my primary goal was to put pen to paper and use these words to heal and grow myself.  A moment of reflection - it has been just over a year that I started writing down my thoughts.  This started very slowly at first and usually quite brief in length.  Now I find myself wanting to create more and would like to spend more time doing it.

The meaning of using some kind of art or a creative process as an outlet is in full force in me.  Support to anyone that might stumble across this writing is - yes go for it, do what you need to do.  I can also feel as you read these words - these words were created just for you - it is almost overwhelming but strangely comforting.  Isn't life amazing?  How is this possible right now of what just happened?  It's almost like magic or a quest or a new leg of your journey has started?

Enjoy the moment and experiences and let your inner small child become alive again.  Like  Picasso said "every child is born a artist - the trick is to not forget that when you grow older".  Take a moment now and just feel - write down your thoughts.  Quiet your mind and whatever comes to you - allow time to write it down - there is a purpose to why that thought just came to you right now.  Use these thoughts, even if it is only one to start with.  Start creating your strong foundation which will enable you to be strong and withstand life's challenges.  Not only stand strong with these challenges but you will be able to grow and evolve during these storms.

 As you practice this you will start to find joy and strength even with things are difficult for you. When you have moments of uncomfortable emotions - gather strength from knowing the fact that these moments will pass.  Overtime as you recognize these moments your strong foundation will allow you to move through these uncomfortable moments.  These moments will happen less and less and when that starts to happen - share your experiences and your growth/accomplishments to others. With the intent to help and pay it forward (always remain kind and truthful to you and others around you)  You will make a positive impact in someone else - now isn't that powerful?  You could be the first being a duck sees.  How is the positive impact of that even measurable?

Things like this makes me feel - wow life is really amazing!!!!! and worth living.

Enjoy - Practice - Be Great and repeat.

The 30th Chapter - When is Enough Reflection Enough

Oct 30/16

Once again I am grateful that I am able to sit down for a moment and put pen to paper.  I never knew how much peace and joy being able to write down my thoughts would move me in a positive direction.

So my thoughts drifted to how my lenses of my view on the world and how that impacts me.  A person once told me that - "maybe sometimes I might search too much to find a deeper meaning when I experience something in life."  and the suggesting was maybe whatever happened was a simple as just what it appears to be on the surface.  As that thought absorbed into me over the next few days - I might spend too much time looking for deep meaning   The comment still remained with me and did not fade away - if felt to me that I had to formulate a feeling and search out if that statement was in fact true.  (On a side note - I am doing it right now aren't I...ha ha) but anyhow.  I now feel that the moments that remain in you in your day to day lives are truly ones that do have a deeper meaning.

Life is full of patterns and as kids we usually always enjoy a quest or adventure.  As we grow older I believe we start to lose our natural ability to use our reflexes.  I believe we are set out as brand new vessels as babies and we area coded with all the skill sets that we require to be successful.  I heard that a baby duck will simulate whatever the first living thing that duck see's once it is hatched.  The power of our surrounding have such a dramatic effect.

So back to the thought of me finding deep meaning into life's experiences - yes absolutely - it is meant for us to spend sometime trying to figure out the meaning.  Sometimes that meaning might not appear at the moment - but with time and if that thought or experience does not fade away.  Then it is not meant to fade away.  Embrace it and have the confidence to explore what you have experienced.  As our days of full of experiences and interactions with others - those brief moment that do stay are meant to for a reason.  The vast majority of your day these moments will not appear and you are not able to search them out.  They will just happen on their own - this short chapter was in a way created by one brief comment of a brief observation by someone else,  When you are living your life with alignment on what you want and in your energy zone (harmony) these moments will come.

So in my experiences sometimes these brief moments have taken over a year for them to provide some kind of meaning.  Be patient, open and aware of when the next quest of meaning comes to you.

This is another example of the universe providing the fuel for you to move forward with purpose and fulfillment.

The 29th Chapter - Embrace Your Normal

Oct 29/16

I would like to share an experience that happened yesterday - that is once I have made small choices on a daily basis that align up to what I truly want in life.  I can feel more each day the energy around me and inside of me.  Now I know that to traditional beliefs this might not sound plausible or even somewhat crazy.  To me it is totally real and my hope is to provide support to whatever your non-traditional ability might be.  From that point embrace it and let your gift grow stronger in you.  Fully allow yourself to be who you know you are.  Please be mindful to always have positive thoughts in mind and not putting out negative energy to others or causing pain to anything.

Use whatever gift you may have in a positive way and be confident that you are not crazy.  I believe, as an advanced people that we think we are, we have only started to begin to understand the complexity of been a human.  Usually our normal behavior, when we do not understand something, we will usually discount it and provide a easy explanation to what is going on or what we just observed.

The patterns I enjoy and how they seem to happen over and over.  In modern times when we see or hear people do things that we cannot explain, usually in young people, our institutions will slowly start to change their behaviors into a way that most of us act in that current reality.  It is easier to ensure everyone conforms to a normalcy vs. trying to explain or accommodate someone that is different.  If by small efforts into trying to change people's behavior does not work then the traditional combination of counselling and some form of medication that will start to change young peoples behavior.  So instead of growing someones special gift and showing how to channel these gifts - we will alter their reality to align up with our know understanding of ours.  With the belief, in general, we are providing tangible tools to help young people to succeed in life - when in reality the root cause of the issue has not been addressed.

It is like emotionally bondage that does not have long term positive effect and sometimes may lead to a life time of pain for these people.  Our methods have changed on how we deal with people that are different in our current time however the root cause of misunderstanding has not.  The same reality of creating a positive reality has still not been achieved.  A couple hundred years ago people that were different were burnt to death and before that people were also treated like some kind of instrument of a dark force.

The pattern usually always turns back to what we do not understand or know we will in some form try to destroy whatever unknown beautiful gifts that is in front of use.  Granted yes there are extreme causes of behavior where people either hurt themselves or others - then of course all measures need to be taken to ensure safety.

 I am making references  to the smaller impact of peoples energy around them.  To support people you observe that are different by asking them questions and believing in them 100%.  There are very popular movies out over the last few years that talk about people that have very unique abilities.  They are usually presented in a fantasy and fiction based - but is it?

I think its possible to take a moment and think of at least one person that you have met that is actually different and do have some kind of gift.  As you ponder that question - think and feel, use your internal compass and that will provide you the answers to that question.

The 28th Chapter - Make Your Choices Count

Oct 23/16

My thoughts have taken me to how to provide some support to those who have struggled with the belief and confidence in your gut feelings.  My experience has been people that can feel energy off of other peoples words.  Sometimes if we make choices and surround ourselves with people that may not always have our best interests at heart, it can become difficult.  What I mean is when we feel things and ask a person about those feelings and we get a verbal response that does not align up to our feelings.  As we are so trusting of these people in our life that what could happen overtime we allow those verbal words from others to overwrite what the energy is telling us - based on what we are feeling from this conversation.

Which could lead to us losing our confidence in our ability to trust our built in energy meter.  When this process starts to happen, slowly overtime, we start to lose who we are and will slowly become more unbalanced.  We will slowly start to shut down things in our life that used to provide us with joy and stability.  When this happens the foundation of us is not able to be maintained and our strength to enjoy life may start to disappear.

It is like we become an observer of our own life - one could describe it as like living in a fog.  The things that used to be so clear to us now are not able to see.  The energy is  drained out of us and is a struggle to stay in the moment with ourselves.  Keep in mind this process will take sometime depending how much time you spend with these type of people combined with how much control you give up in your life to these type of exchanges.

In my case it took about a year, at the start of the year feeling so alive, so full of energy to the point my skin could feel the positive energy around me.  Slowly over the year one feeling and one conversation at a time - my feelings and the person I was became lost.  In my case I noticed health effects which included loose of sleep and a general feeling of fatigue to list a few.  It will happen so slowly you probably will not even realize it.  It was only after I removed this type of people from my life did I realize the negative impact it was having on me.

The long hard process now starts of rebuilding yourself and will start to ask questions like  What has just happened?  Who am I?  So awareness is the key to recognize this has just happened but better yet you have now realized what was slowly draining you of your life's energy.   This is like the process of learning to walk, do not let yourself lay on the ground when you fall, but to learn from your choices and stand up even stronger.  Lean from how the slow drain of emotionally vampire experience was and how it changed you as the person you should be.

As you know by now I appreciate the value of pattern and of numbers.  So I thought of three things or check points that you can bring into your life as a gauge to know who you should surround yourself with in your life.  By using these tools you can also allow yourself to stay in the your moment and to enjoy life.

Step 1.  Is to pay attention to the words of a person you are talking to and from there leads to step 2.  Step 2. Ask yourself does their words align up to what they are saying in regards to their non-verbal communication?  So if they are telling you there is nothing wrong but their non-verbal communication is showing the opposite.  There is a few things that could be adding to this, maybe anger? or tears? or outright aggression?  If this does happen rarely then the thought would be not a pattern and as we are humans we all do make mistakes and not an issue.  However if this reoccurs then go to step 3.  Step 3 is pay attention to what energy you are picking up?  What are you feeling does it align up to either verbal or non-verbal communication?

Your final check of what your built in energy compass is telling you.  I can not express this enough - go with your compass and do not question it.  Just go with it and keep this thought simple in you - if you do not head to this internal warning you will lose yourself.  This compass can be compared to your true magnetic north pole, use this as your guide to your path.

Now from what you decide to do now is critical.  If you decide to ignore your magnetic compass you will start the slow journey of losing yourself and you will become lost on your quest.  This will happen with ignoring yourself and one experience or event one moment at a time.

My suggestion would be if a person has three different conversations with you and all three conversations you do not receive alignment of the 3 steps.  Perhaps it is time to think this relationship and the impact it is having on you.  In my case putting distance is paramount when experiences like this happen.  I can assure you if you continue to have people like this in your life that over time you will lose yourself - that there is no question.

I am not saying these people are bad people it might just be more of a case the different type of energy that is getting exchanged is not in alignment.  For your own health and growth to chose to have different type of people in your life that help in building your strong foundation.

You truly are the captain of yourself and you ultimately have to take all the credit for all of your outcomes you experience in life.  Just pay attention and heed the light houses that come into your life to direct you away from a unwanted disaster.

The 27th Chapter - Growing Your Spiritual Gift

Oct 22/16

I am thinking of energy and when you are in the energy moment that is the healthy place for you.  It will provide you strength.  Also people, when you least expect it, are paying attention to you and your energy as well.  I would like to share a experience that happened about a year ago.  I was walking with a co-worker from a parking lot to our head office.  We had to wait at a cross walk for the light to change.  As we were waiting a early 30's year old man, with blonde curly hair, blue eyes and a tan long coat walked up to us.  As he looked at me, a feeling of recognition came across me, and I could also feel he recognized me.  However I know I have never met him before in this life.  He looked at my co-worker looked back to me, no words were exchanged but of a moment of recognition and energy.   It felt like that brief moment was an invitation but I am unsure of what that invitation was.  The light changed and we walked our different directions.  After a brief moment had passed I asked my co-worker if they had observed the same thing I just did.  The response back was - what are you talking about?  I said you didn't see the guy that walked up to us and I describe him.  My co-worker said - what guy?  I have not fully understood what that moment fully meant, however it has stayed with me for a year.

During the past year I had shut down exploring and growing my spiritual side.  I have normally never been able to see spirits and in the past I could only feel them.  So because of that experience on the street corner, it had left me of not sure who I saw, until about a week ago.  I was in a period of my life of not feeling like I had balance.  I had felt I had lost my direction, my stability and my passion.  This past Monday I was on my way to work and I realized I forgot my office keys.  As I am early to work and most often the door is locked.  So I turned around and went home to pick up my key.  I knew at that moment that something was going to happen that day that  would provide a key to help me find some balance and realigning my energy.  That moment of forgetting my key cost me about 15 minutes of time (keep in mind I never forget my office keys) because of that delay in time, I ended up bumping into a couple that I have known for years but have not seen them for over three years.  This chance meeting was only because of the 15 minute delay I experienced in the morning.

The conversation started out like the normal, one of meeting up with good friends and catching up however it rapidly it changed to a spiritual recognition.  This change in conversation lead me to learn about a whole new side of their life that they shared freely with me.  During that moment we shared several different ideas and experiences over the last while, one of them was the experience of the above of the blonde stranger.  As I finished the story the husband went out to their vehicle and brought a book.  He stated he was carrying around this book for a year and wasn't sure who it was for until now.

As I started reading the book later that night the author describes her experience of meeting a guy that met the description of the blonde stranger at the beginning of this chapter.  The thought came to me when you are truly seeking and needing help or direction it will come to you.  The harder part is to being open to when life brings you something of value.  Also just as important is to have patients with yourself and your journey of life.

For me it took over a year for me to understand what that brief moment meant that took place on a side of a street.  I also am fully aware that even now, I do not fully understand that moment, it is truly about understanding a little more at a time.  It would be unrealistic to finish a race with one step and this same pattern happens in our life's journey of understanding - it is about taking one step at a time to reach your full knowledge.  With each step a little more refined the goal will become - picture an iceberg, where you can only see just a little of the total volume of that ice on the surface.  Like this experience just the tip to understood and a beginning of learning.  Combined with the realization of fully committing myself to a new journey in my quest.

I have so much more to learn and my hope is by sharing these thoughts with those that have chose to read it - will in turn I hope supports your own new life journey.  Your journey is yours and yours alone - to be able to create and feel all the greatness that life has to offer.  Keep in mind, like the person training for their marathon, it takes commitment and dedication.  Although this task my seem hard or maybe you feel like you could never do whatever journey you are on - You can and the universe will provide you all the strength and energy you need to successfully complete your goals.

The more you align yourself to your surroundings and maintain your balance - this quest will actually feel easy to complete.

The 26th Chapter - The Importance of Time and Increasing Your Value

Oct 16/16

So it has now been a half a month since I published my first blog on chapter 1.  These first writings are over a year old and my thoughts turn too the content of this writing.  I am reflecting on my confidence of this writing and what is the value add for anyone that might be reading it.  My thoughts turn to time and the fact that time is truly a gift I do not want to waste in anyone, like emotional energy, there is only a limited amount available to each and everyone of us.

My thoughts went to a story I read a while ago, I am not sure the author or the origin of the story, so I will paraphrase my memory of it.  This story takes place by a ocean, on a beach.  The previous night that was a massive storm and during that storm thousands of Starfish are washed up onto the beach from the waves.  In the morning, after the storm is over and all is quiet, a man is walking down the beach and notices all of the Starfish covering the beach.  He continues walking and after a while he comes across a young boy picking up one Starfish at a time and gently placing them back into the ocean.  The man watches the boy for a short while then comments to the young boy - why are you picking up the Starfish and placing them back into the ocean?  You can not physically pick up and save all the thousands of Starfish stranded far up on the beach.  What difference are you actually making?  The young boy quickly responded back with the difference is been made to each and every individual Starfish I save and return to the ocean.

What a fantastic statement and how can you counter that thought to the souls of each Starfish the boy saved that day.  As we get older our perception may get clouded on what really is important and this is an example of the same facts of reality and yet how different two people view that reality.   The value of our choices are measured each day and from each choice our house of life is getting built. Are we making choices that are making a difference or we making choices that are not?  Also are our choices actually taking away or questing people that are making positive choices?

That leads me to my original thought to if this writing is of any value or not to the people that may read this.  I have taken comfort in the fact that if this writing helps or makes a positive impact in just one person - then yes there is value.  I know my original goal of a venue to provide healing to my emotional self is working.  In moments of my discomfort I turn to writing, my wonder of what will be created as pen meets paper truly does excite me each time and the feelings of discomfort  slowly start to fade away.  The gift of life, the gift to be able to feel, the gift of being able to grow and evolve is truly amazing.  What will be the next adventure?  Will I be ready for it?

Which leads to some more reflection on time  and how brief moments of time of interactions with others or our personal internal triumphs can be so brief, but yet have so much definition of who we think we are are or what others may believe we are.  That marathon runner might spend years getting ready for that one race in public.  That one event will show to themselves or people watching on the impact of all that struggle and determination that  has lead to that event or moment in time.  During these moments have you trained enough?  Have you put in enough effort for the results you would like to experience?  At the completion of whatever that moment maybe for you, will you feel the satisfaction you have truly done your best?  Did you return enough Starfish to the ocean?  Or do you feel you could have done more?  When these brief moments have been completed be mindful of the outcome and feel it.  Even if it is not exactly the way you pictured the outcome, take comfort in the fact you have achieved so much and gather strength to the fact you can achieve so much more.  Keep in mind the important factor of balance and in the above the story - the one part the man did get right was the fact it was not possible to save all the Starfish.  Like in our lives - we can not individually save everything and if we were to try, we would end up hurting ourselves.

Do not let these events in your your like lock you into a past, whether this experience was good or bad, that to stay in the moment as the event is now complete.  Learn from these moments and start putting your emotional energy into your next accomplishment.  Whether it is a quest for personal growth, relationships or your next promotion.  Set yourself clear and concise goals - once that has been complete determine the steps you need to take to achieve that goal and take that first step.

It truly is that easy to achieve whatever it is you want to achieve.

The 25th Chapter - Your Stretch Goal Will Become Your New Normal

Oct 15/16

So I felt the need to write and create something today that has never been created before.  (talk about a lofty and stretch goal)  However I was not sure of what the topic would be.

As I was walking into a small store to pick up some water and a energy drink, I noticed a small piece of paper laying outside of the store.  As I passed by I recognized this piece of paper as a  fortune cookie insert.  I walked past it and as I was paying, the thought came to me that I had to read it and that fortune was mean't for me to read it.  With even more clarity it felt it would be waiting for me to pick it up and read it.  As I picked it up, I was worried it might fall apart as it was sitting outside in the snow and rain.  As I read it, I was overcome with different thoughts and emotions, ones of feelings of excitement combined with a sense of loss.  The sense of loss I think has come from, I have been so used to being un-happy and I  am in a struggle of finding my balance.  Even though now I am in a happy place, the new normal for me, it was a brief moment of recognizing a past experience in me.  It could be compared to somewhat bitter sweet, knowing how much growth I have received and for a brief moment almost sad of the person I used to be.  Perhaps a good comparison would be the habit of smoking and knowing it is bad for ones health.  As the habit had stopped, still looking back feeling the need for one more smoke - even though knowing that even one is bad for you.  The over all quest of people looking for something or someone to fill that void - thinking that maybe one more time and that elusive feeling of being complete will arrive.  It would be so comfortable and you know what to expect, its easy to go back into the past pattern of behavior.

What is tougher is staring into the great abyss of the unknown, the start of a new journey or a quest, and to take the first step.  As with each passing step it will take you closer to your new experience yet as you go forward, your one step further away from what you know.  Picture a almost invisible energy like line tied to you - at the beginning of your journey it is pulling you back a little harder than towards the end of your line that is tied to the completion of your journey.  Roughly when your at the half way mark of your journey you will feel a shift of that invisible line providing you energy and start to get easier to complete your journey, as this energy shift is propelling you to the end of your quest.

So it has occurred to me to share what I read from that fortune cookie - "Your greatest wish - you will receive this month"  So questions came up - What does that mean?  Does it mean something or mean nothing?  Was it a clue to my future or was it a clue to my past?  The universe telling me to let things be?  Or does it simply mean nothing?

So now I am thinking the secret in life and true happiness is to be able to recognize what this gift might be in a month from now and to not come up with ideas of what I think this gift is.  The importance of not looking for something I feel the gift should be as if I do that the true gift might sail right by me as I will not be able to recognize it.  As the month will go by so quickly and if I do not receive what I think I should have received - it might be possible to start a spiral of self-doubt combined with lower energy level might become a reality.  Words or things like blame, resentment, unhappiness may perhaps come into play now.

Like the marathon runner - do not give up with your journey of allowing yourself to be great and being able to experience great things in your life.  You are allowed to be happy everyday and experience great things in all that life has to offer.  In my past I would feel that when something amazing comes my way I would struggle to accept it.  When I would do that - I put out to the universe I am not able to handle the great things that come my way and not have them in my life.  When that thought would happen soon the goodness would go away and I would be left with the emptiness and wishing I could have back what I felt I had lost.  During these times not realizing it was me creating that reality of not having the greatness in my life.  It sometimes felt like my life was a page out of a Shakespearean tragedy and the pattern kept repeating.....Which resulted in me becoming more confused and not understanding why I was not receiving the greatness I felt should be coming my way.

My greatest wish was a simple as reading that fortune cookie and the thoughts it provided me, which I am truly grateful.  Key take aways are the importance of staying in the moment, while yet looking briefly to your past, to select your tools of past experience to use them to build towards your perfect future.

The 24th Chapter - Change Your Thoughts - Change Your Life

Oct 10/16

My thoughts drift to who I really am as a person.  Do you ever feel you wish you could change some of the things you feel are not thought as positive traits?  Either thoughts you have of yourself or the feeling that you can pick up from others you interact with?  That underlying feeling (although not entirely sure where the specific feeling is coming from) that you feel that something is off or not in alignment.  Where does this feeling or energy come from?  Is it leftover remnants of energy from past experiences from ones childhood upbringing?  Influences of religion?  Parents?  Teachers?

The feeling of not belonging comes to mind, perhaps the root cause of un-comfortableness, as humans we are social beings and need to feel part of a pack.  There might be times that no matter how hard you try to fit in to this pack, sometimes it just does not feel right.  When this does happen, What do you do?  In previous chapters the concept of the universe will provide you what you need and when you need it  has been discussed.  So when these feelings of being uncomfortable and not belonging occur, look around and pay attention to what the universe is showing you right now.  A key to be able to benefit from this information is to be able to stay in the present moment.  Be mindful of looking either forward or back into your future.  From this starting point you will be able to grow your internal strength and eventually find the pack that you belong too.  Push your boundaries of what you think you can accomplish.  When you have those feelings of un-comfortableness try to embrace it as it can be a sign from the universe that you need to grow.  Perhaps if you never have that feeling you are not fully living life?

Just recently I connected up with a old man and I noticed in that old man his power to actively listen was impactful to me.  Picture a tough, tall, strong man and in about 15 minutes of time, as our conversations progressed, he was talking about his childhood memories and I could feel emotions come up in him.  All I did was to extend back his actively listen lesson he just had taught me and listened to him.  The gift of sharing is all around you and to accept it and embrace emotions of others as well.  These moments will be providing you the keys to unlock your feelings and provide you fuel for your quest.  Do not feel guilty if you think you are taking energy from them, as this was a gift that was meant to be given to you.  Always be mindful to ensure you communicate energy back to others when they need it.  This is  a concept if we all practice this daily - it will help with the balance of not only us, but for our community, which of course leads to have global effects.  Picture the concept of the butterfly effect or a pebble dropped into a pond.  When you are truly actively listening to a person that is giving you their energy - this interaction will be in perfect balance of energy and it will feel right.

At that time I met this older gentleman, I was feeling unsettled, and because of this experience it provided me a calmness.  Also the perfect randomness of this experience made a impact to me, for the chances of all our combined choices in life - brought us to that very moment in time.  That moment was brief and there is a very high chance I will never see him again.  I truly hope I was able to give a small fraction of energy back to him, as he provided me with powerful gifts - the gifts of his time and provided me with the gift of life's fuel.

As I reflected this is another example of life being at balance and the universe will always provide.  The importance of always been open and feel that you are worth great things.  All of us are born with greatness in us - that is the easy part - the hard part is to allow that greatness to come out.  Allow and grow to truly become full adults.  It is easy to see physical growth and age in people however just as important is to always grow your inside energy.   At first glance you might assume that this physical growth matches the internal growth - however most people struggle with this growth and our greatness may never fully develop.

Everyday I am grateful of the people I meet and their time.  Maybe life is not random at all?  Complex yes but not random - but yet in complexity is simplicity.  Pattern realizations make things simple in life.

The 23rd Chapter - Lean From Your Past But Not Too Long

Oct 8/16

My thoughts turn to self-reflection and self-analyzing.  In my past I have sometimes spent too much energy doing too much reflection of myself.  It is healthy to do this process with balance and this can be a tool that helps promote your emotional growth.  Basically you can learn from your past experiences - whether these experiences were good or bad.

To help determine what you want to learn from or grow from is remember your experiences and the end result of how they made you feel.  In the current state or in the now your choices will create that emotions again.  Be mindful of your choices and how they will impact your emotions as these emotions are a driver of your choices you make.

So some positive advice I have received is to be able to interlock both my analytic mind and my emotional self.  Sometimes our emotional self will make decisions for us that are completely opposite of what our analytical mind would chose.  Feelings can be so powerful that you will ignore your mind or what your gut feeling of the now.  This result may propel you to enter a place of irrational behavior with the hope that the outcome will be different then the last time.  However the reality is usually the exact same outcome will repeat.  The classic detention of insanity.

Thus my past reflection - my past state will sometimes seem to operate to much on emotions and has caused internal emotional pain.  Once again I am reminded of the importance to have balance in life. It is still very important to experience emotions however when you are making decisions that continually cause you emotional paint - to then be aware of this process.  Look back to why and what is causing you to make these decisions.  Quiet your mind - look inward and ask yourself why - you might have to ask yourself more than once why to get to the root of the issue.  Usually if you are lacking clarity of what your emotions are telling you, you might need to has yourself why again several times as you might not be fully understanding of what the issue is.  Remember there is not a time limit on how long this could take but to have confidence that you can believe yourself with the key to balance.  There is a possibility that you will never fully be able to get clarity and when that happens to be able to let it go and move on is also very important.  Even though we usually all want to be successful in our journey of life there will be times you will not be able to get the resutls that you feel that you need.  That is ok - with time you will understand what the experience was and remember the universe provides you what you need and when you need it,

To often it is thought this process can be handled in a easy manner - using the traditional manner of using anti-depressants or  use some other type of self-abusive behavior to suppress the feeling of uncomfortable emotional pain.  However like everything in life - you may have to fully experience the pain of these past experiences.  Of course use healthy means to deal with your current journey and like the person training for the marathon, use the tools to help you train to reach your goal, but it is up to you to actually cross the finish line.

As the universe always is in perfect harmony  and  to realize that the effort you have put into your current emotional state will need the equal and opposite effort to change that emotional state.  Perhaps not a easy process to accomplish however at least a road map has now been provided to you to complete this next quest in your life's journey.

The 22nd Chapter - Finding Your Balance and Taking Your Control Back

Oct 2/16

As I stated in the beginning in chapter 1, that this writing is also a way for me to heal.  I was reflecting on  a past relationship and the negative energy that was generated from that past experience.  Even though time had past being together physically (emotionally even longer) there was still lingering effects of not being able to find my center of balance for a while.  This would not happen often but I did notice a pattern of when I was tired it sometimes would surface.

The thought of control comes to mind and how I allowed another person to shift my energy balance and became someone I was not.  A example of this (although at the time I did not realize the significance of it) I ran into a co-worker and the next time I saw the co-worker they had commented that they did not even recognize me, as the person I was.  " you were not the same person I know" and at the time I did not think about that statement - however with time I realized the universe was again providing me with another key to help find my center of balance.

Once I realize this it caused me to pause and wonder what else am I missing out in life.  This moment in my life has resulted in me becoming stronger and more confident that I can make choices that would prove valuable for me in the moment as well as the future.  From there it has helped me to heal and to propel myself further in creating my own happiness.   As I wrote about before that is all part of the strong foundation we need in our life to be able to provide our own purpose....We all are truly created with greatness in us and it is up to us to use the keys from the universe to unlock the greatness.

The signs of support and to be able to live a life where you gain strength are all around you.  Life is truly a gift and this is an example of how, by your internal choices, you can create whatever outcome you think.  What is also amazing, that even when you are making incorrect decision for you, the universe will come over to you and gently remind you that you are on the wrong path for you.  Based on your current choices  are you losing yourself or your energy?  So conversely the opposite is also true when you are making correct and positive choices for you, Life will show you, what may appear to be random events, but they are not, they are also placed there for you to grow your energy and allow you to feel more confident.

The grace of the universe is endless and the only secret is for you to pay attention to whatever comes your way and based on your choices you will be stronger or not - it truly is that simple.

In closing look in the mirror and say "you are worth it" and allow yourself to feel life and the energies that surround you.  When something appears to be random - how did that random event effect your energy?  Use that knowledge of that experience to allow you to make decisions to help you get to where you need to go.

When you have completed your day and your laying doing to rest - allow yourself to reset and tomorrow is truly all you need for the moment.

Life is truly a learning experience and leveling up to a higher lever of living.

The 21st Chapter - The Power of Your Thoughts

Oct 2/16

I am thinking about what to create today and my mind is wondering all over - it seems like today's energy is flowing and there is a abundance of ideas coming to me.  I would first like to share about my friend John - also a person with great strength and in-sight to whom I am very grateful that he has influenced me in a positive way.

Yesterday morning was my first day of posting my writings out in public via this blog and sharing my thoughts out to the universe to see what happens.  This experience has been very emotionally for me - fearful ones and thoughts of what happens if people will laugh at this experience.  However quickly they become emotions of happiness that has lead to shedding of many tears as I have been reflecting and sharing these words.  From this experience I have slowly started to feel stronger and the fearfulness that I experienced at the beginning does not even come to my mind now.   I still care and hope that these writings provide value to all - however now I feel I share at a level I have never experienced before.

A moment of reflection - it is incredible what the power of a thought starts with and then the first step and how amazing it feels to walk away from fear and not let it hold you back.  It truly doesn't matter of what you chose to share  has any positive impact on others of whatever creative avenue you find an outlet to heal - as long as your intent is always based on kindness.  Never let your thoughts and actions become negative - but true health is truly about you and the strength you will feel has no replacement.  The highs and lows, happiness and sadness is really all inside of you.  You have a nuclear furnace of energy inside of you and whatever you want to do you can do it.  It is truly that simple - you don't need anything at all from an outside source in regards to drugs or other professional help.  Don't get me wrong - there is always a time for professional consular type of help and it takes a strong person to go for that help.  I have gone and will continue to go for help and look for tools for my continued growth.  Once you get to a point of growth there comes a time when you have to go forward by yourself and no one or drugs can do that for you but you.

Picture a little bird in a nest born completely helpless, with no feathers or skills to successfully survive in the world.  This bird is completely dependent on its parents for its survival and as time passes this little bird is provided with everything it needs in life. This bird slowly grows stronger, develops a culture and masters the language of song and then finally the day comes - this new bird has no choice but to leave the next and to fly away to survive.  The tools that it had relied on at the beginning of life are now no longer present.  This process is comparable to our emotional growth or whatever goal, task or great thing we want to do.  As like the bird - no one but that bird can fly for him.  Imagine the power in that little bird now has as it can fly away and over power the force of gravity.  This is the same pattern we experience of whatever quest we chose to go on....Using the tools around us are paramount at the beginning however a time comes when it is truly up to us to complete the quest and finish the journey.

So as I started my day yesterday I had a thought/hope that it would be nice so nice to meet up with John, but didn't reach out to him as he lives approximately two hours away.  No longer then two hours later I received a text from John asking to meet up for coffee in my town.  The reinforcement of the power of thought and also the reinforcement that the universe is becoming more of a balance place for me.  I have learned when I am making choices that are healthy for me - it will almost seem like a reward that my thoughts and hope will be rewarded.  The bigger overall picture is that energy is balanced and amazing things will start to happen to you.  It is important to watch for what appears to be random events but if you are noticing them - they might not be random.  I feel that this is the universe's way to provide you the fuel you need to live a full and incredible life.

Like the bird that was born to grow and fly away - so the pattern is in you as you grow and it's up to you to take what the universe provides and make something greater based on what comes into your life and replicate positive energy to even further contribute to the universe and being a part of something that is in perfect harmony.  This all starts with you and your strong foundation.

What is the legacy you will create?  Will you make choices that add in a positive way to your life and to the people around you?

The 20th Chapter - Personal Story of Reflection of My Past Relationships

Oct 1/16

Normally I hope I can provide a specific point in each of these chapters that will provide clarity and understanding that can be used in some form by others in their life.  However today I feel the need to share some personal experiences and a moment of reflection.  So this will be more about feelings and not about some possible solutions.

I find my thoughts drifting to my past relationships and then to my current emotional state of being alone on a weekend.  The weather is cold with light rain and I am sitting at a local coffee shop, having my favorite drink - a medium white hot chocolate with whip cream.  My thoughts turn to my kids who are rapidly becoming more independent with each passing moment.  I am finding this allows me to have more spare time.  Which is something I was looking forward to this when my kids were younger, now though I feel strangely guilty of the passing of time and wishing for my increased free time.  I am struck now with the importance of being in the moment and valuing each second - I have heard that thought before from other older folks - but now it seems to be so real to me and I can relate to the importance of the moment at a higher level than before.

Interesting reflection as now I have the time to devote to a relationship I do not have one - I feel when I did I was not able to balance kids (as I am a single father) work and a romantic relationship.  In truth I found I was so emotionally wore out and low on energy that I could provide for others - I was unable to make anyone happy.

Then my thoughts go to faded romantic relationships and why I would pick the wrong person for me and all the wasted time and pain that I have caused my kids, ex-partners and myself.  My hope is that at the moment my kids and my ex-partners are free of any emotional un-comfort and mostly now any thoughts of the past would only be fleeting memories of moments past.

As time moves on the comfort from knowing that our past moments of our life are truly meant to be and they have built to who we are right now.  Knowing the comfort of I did try my best at the time and take the experiences and make them into learning objectives of the quest for me to becoming a better human being.  Enjoying spending time with myself and feeling myself grow and become stronger.  I have notice my smile has returned and my shoulders and pulled back.  Quiet confidence is within  in me and enjoying each person that I interact with.

I would have normally been on a quest to find someone to fill the past void in me, now I am feeling the opposite and I am not willing to settle and be un-happy any longer.  The constant ignoring of my gut feeling - I shall never do again.  The reference of a death by a thousand cuts comes to mind.  Ignoring the feeling that something is off and not sure what it is - I shall never do that again either.

My thoughts now drift to the moment and I also spend a little time thinking about the future.....Perhaps now is the time to travel and doing some wondering??  To see what positive experiences that are waiting and to explore.  The movie of Hector and the search of happiness comes to mind.

As I started this chapter as pen went to paper, I felt some sadness and as I finish I feel thoughts of hope, excitement and happiness.

Thank you.

The 19th Chapter - Empath Support - You Are Not Alone

Sept 18/16

This chapter is based on to provide support to those of us folks that are a empath  and can feel or pick up other people's energy they are giving off to their environment.  I have struggled in the past with feelings of un-comfortableness and confidence on whether or now what I was feeling from another person was accurate or not.  As what would happen was once I picked up that emotion from someone else, (good or bad) I would ask the person if what they were putting out was in alignment to what I felt. In my case when this would happen, it would be with someone that is very close to me hence the power of their words would affect me dramatically more than general life interactions.  Usually they would deny what I was feeling from them.

To those of you reading this that have this gift, you will immediately identify to these words, and you just know.  To answer the how this happens, that I do not know, as my goal is to support you when this does happen.

So I thought of a tangible tool or a way to try to help vet out this feeling.  This seems to have helped me and my intent is to share with others that might feel the same complexity and use this tool to present as sense of relief.  Once again I am drawn to a form of a pattern of starting with steps one, two and three.

Step 1 - Once the feeling has come to you and you "just know" listen to the communication coming to you when you ask this person about this feeling - in regards to the verbal communication.  Actively listen and hear to understand what the person is communicating with the intent to understand and be mindful to not formulate a response at that time.

Step 2 - as they are verbally communicating with you and you are actively listening, start to observe the non-verbally communication that is getting provided to you.  Are the words and non-verbal actions in alignment at that moment in time?  A simple example of this is if they are saying they are happy and they appreciate you in their life - does their non-verbal communication have alignment to these words that are getting expressed?  eyes are happy and glowing?  Smile on their face?  Looking at you with kindness on their face?

Step 3 - so based on what you experienced on the steps and two and if you can feel feel's energy.  You add into what you felt during this conversation, Does it all have aliment?  Does it feel right?  If it does not then perhaps ask some more questions to them to try to understand what is really going on.  It is possible there are several different scenarios going on with that person and you could be feeling something from them that is painful to them, yet not directly related to the current experience you are having with them.

With practice this gift can help provide you with a great amount of comfort however with not learning how to read and understand the information coming to you - it can become very painful.  When that happens it may actually feel like your gift is actually a burden vs. a gift.  Also remember when you know your gift the intent is to never change people if you find that you are not having alignment with them.  One of the key ingredients of this communication to work between two people is that both people are completely honest with their communication on all forms.  If one of these two people for whatever reason are not able to be honest - you will never receive the feeling of relief.  Be mindful when this starts to happen, it will slowly drain you of your energy and will cause you to become very unsettled.  When those times happen - start asking yourself what does the core of you direct you to do?  Picture that core as a light house on a cliffs edge - like the light house to the ship providing warning to the ship passing by - so does your internal light house.  What will happen if you chose to ignore your internal life house warnings long enough - you will end up experiencing some kind of emotional damage.

When you finally reach the point that you are unable to provide any more energy to this person and they are unable to communicate in a way that does align up to your feelings.  No further amount of communication with them can change the outcome of non-alignment.  Then you have to let them go at this point in time.  If you do not let them go at that time the result will be a slow downward spiral of energy drain which will ultimately you could end up losing yourself.  The confidence in you could be so damaged to the point you start to think you maybe starting to lose your sense of reality.

Never give up, do not be afraid to be strong.  Your thoughts and feelings are yours alone and no one else owns them except for you.  So as long as you know the foundation of you is based on kindness to yourself and others around you - take comfort in being you and chose to have people in your life that bring you alignment.

The 18th Chapter - Create The Change You Want in Your Life

Sept 17/16

I was talking to an old dear friend today and they expressed that finally after several years of living a good life, being a good person and trying very hard on self growth he is finally feeling that life is giving him good fortune.  As we talked, he reflected and wondered why it took so long for a positive change to actually start to happen in his life.

After the conversation was over, I reflected on his question - my thoughts drifted to patterns that I enjoy so much in life.  These same type of patterns exist all around us and repeat over and over, whether it is in our physical environment or in our emotional inside being.   From that starting point my thoughts then went to the theory of every action has an opposite and equal reaction and I thought how that would apply to my life and my friends.

The theory extents to energy that is inside us and we can not physically see and can be represented by a+b=c.  What I mean by that is so whatever you are currently thinking of or your current mind state is  (a) then added to a multiplier (b) whether positive or negative will give you an outcome of c.  Therefore if you spend a great deal of your life in negative and self sabotage behaviors - that amount of time (could be years) of negative energy will lead you to a very deep level of negative results.

So in my friends case, when he was finally able to recognize  his choices were not aligning up to what he wanted.  He was at the point that he was finally ready and able to truly start wanting to live a positive life.  As above this theory may apply to him, as he spent years of effort and created a low energy level in himself will not take the same amount of time and the same amount of energy to come back to center of his being.  I believe the multiplier of time can enable you to change your current state in life quicker once you realize your goal and have alignment.  However the overall energy remains exactly the same that has to be produced by you to get back from your net negative to a net zero balance.  So now you can rest and it is clear sailing?  No - this is just the resetting phase of your net energy is open and it is possible for you to navigate to whatever direction you chose

Other examples of the variable b, when your not in your alignment, could be drugs or negative behaviors that can have an effect to speed up your negative affect and create more energy at a faster pace.  Picture a large ocean going vessel that starts to sink in the water, at first this process seems to be quite slow, but once the vessel is fully submerged the speed of the descent increases.  If it is in a deep part of the ocean - the speed will continue to build on the descent as well the energy created and once it lands at the bottom there are times when the vessel will bury part of itself deep in the ocean floor.  An famous tragic example of that is the Titanic as it hit the ocean bottom with so much force part of the bow is buried in mud.

Where (a) (you and your choices) sometimes might seem hard as you are the one that has to produce all the energy to reverse your life's negative spiral.  As there are factors or substances that help you produce the energy to go down faster, there is not a miracle cure or pill to help you build the positive energy.  That all has to come from you - if you spent years not running and time is not on your side, there is not a long term easy thing to do or take other than your inner desire to accomplish your goals.

Be patient and once you feel yourself on a net zero balance sheet, enjoy your accomplishment of what you pulled yourself out of, yet be mindful the work is not done.  In my friends case it took several years to erase all the negative energy  to a point what he was truly wanting was starting to manifest in his life.  This journey of your life is truly one step and one thought at a time to reach whatever end goal you are creating in the present.  It is possible to reach a state of mind of peacefulness and full joy with your life one present moment at a time as you are creating your beautiful house.

Remember when you fall down for a moment and your not feeling like your making enough progress to what you feel your life should look like.....Never Never Never give up or lose focus on your goal of what you are tying to accomplish.

Think your are amazing, because you are, which will lead to you becoming great.

The 17th Chapter - Communicating Your Internal Growth

Aug 20/16

I was reflecting on how to illustrate a way to communicate my own internal growth that would be meaningful and provide a key to someone that would it find valuable.  So I thought again of the start of building a beautiful large house that would represent your emotional and intellectual evolution.  This process would start basically as a new born - you are imprinted with insight tools to start this process.  When you start to grow older, your self awareness makes this process go faster.   However the lack of self awareness will possibly cause your growth to stop.

So one process at a time is started with the beginnings of a foundation, as you age your environment will also start to impact the architecture of you - with different levels of influence - usually at this time parents will play a high level of influence.  Also external experiences that you go through and the choices you make, what you bring into your life,  will also have an impact of this.

There will be periods of you feel that you know the outcome and desired state that your internal house should look like, when you will learn something new that will required some renovations.  It can be normal to become frustrated when this happens and want to lower your self awareness, which will slowly stop your growth.  Take comfort in knowing this is a pattern that does replicate around us in the physical world that happens all the time - like the marathon running training for the first marathon.  There will be periods this runner will not want to finish - draw strength from your set goals and push forward and growth.

Take your new knowledge and use it as a tool to become better and be mindful to not resist what the universe is providing to you.  As this information will allow you to continue to build a beautiful large house that you are the only one that can build it and also the end state of whatever it becomes is truly up to you.

The 16th Chapter - Look for Signs Your Living Your Life

Aug 17/16

So I woke up on a beautiful Saturday summer morning, with no plans other than I did not want to waste a precious summer day.  I decided to go on a random last minute road trip to the majestic western Canadian mountains.  After a long day's motorbike ride I ended up decided to see if I could find a room for the night at a town buried deep in the mountains.  I was lucky enough to finally find a room for night, as many people were already there and most of the rooms were already taken.

As I settled down on a park bench, to enjoy the evening air, next to a busy street filled with all kinds of traffic.  Only a brief moment had passed when a group of people wondered by and in that group I recognized a person I knew.  After a brief conversation with that person we parted ways and a comment spoken by them remained with me....."I love coming to visit here and the mountains but my partner would rather not.....so because of this I rarely come here".  Once again this small comment made a large impact with me, in the fact this person is making some choices to deny what they find can bring joy to their life.

So some of your reading this might think I am suggesting to not ever compromise in a relationship or to the extreme thought, to not even have a relationship.  To be clear I am not suggesting that at all and my point is to be mindful of the choices you make in your life.  The term death of a thousand cuts comes to mind, meaning in your intimate relationships, when you slowly start to make decision to compromise with your partner you may slowly start to loose who you are as a amazing person. Before you realize it you make wake up one day not been able to recognize the person you are right now in the moment.

If you are daily mindful of your choices and the impact of those choices are on your life, you can make adjustments and focus on you and your emotional health.  All before it is either too late in losing yourself or perhaps losing someone that is very close to you.  When so much damage has been now created, without you realizing it, and it seems impossible to repair and see a future together with that person or knowing the clarity of you.

This moment on the park bench has caused me to reflect of some of my failed relationships and the pain my choices have caused myself and others around me.  As I was not mindful of my small choices I made and I did loose myself.  When the re-building would start over again on my foundation and my search to find joy again in the life around me.  I needed fuel to carry on and small moments of joy, ones like in this chapter helped me on my long road to recovery.

Once you start re-building it will feel at times that this process will take a long time and sometimes might start to feel like a marathon run with no training at all.  All the while it seems like your going up-hill and path under your feet is moving backwards and just about when your starting to feel unsure of your path - you will be provided with an experience that will energize you and propel you forward.

As you start to feel a positive change in you, the moments of "marathon running" will start to get easier and you will start to feel the periods been lost become shorter while you will feel the periods of having energy becoming longer.

This will be on your step of alignment and feeling in-sync of who you are and having the energy flow around you.  Picture riding a canoe in the mountains in the sweet spot of the current and going the same direction of the current.  You surge ahead with each paddle stroke plus at a combined rate of the flowing current.  The energy to go the same distance is vastly lower than if you were doing it all alone.

Enjoy your efforts and the positive energy of alignment.

The 15th Chapter - Steps to Creating Your Life's Journey

March 6/16

Today I have realized another new life's journey (quest) has started.  As in any long journey there is usually legs or smaller pieces that combine together to reach your end destination.  Along the way there will be moments that stay in your memory and make a larger impact than other parts of the journey.

This experience was triggered today as I was watching a movie and found myself with tears streaming down my face, then I thought back to, unlocking the key to my confidence is within me.   I realized to build this confidence in me, one of the keys is to follow what you need to do no matter what it is.  Always be mindful to always be kind to yourself and others in whatever you acts maybe.

So even though I feel I have been trying to find happiness, I realized I was basing on how to accomplish this goal on too much advice of other people around me.  I have forgotten how to have balance in my life, others can provide a perspective and insight on achieving your goals...However at the end of the day it is up to us to do the hard work and no one else can provide a magic pill for what you seek.

The key to truly loving myself was also missing and believing in myself....It was at this time I had to live my life choices for me and by doing that I would attract like minded people into my life.  Once this starts to happen then balance and harmony would be felt and my life would be in a way that it is supposed to be.  Alignment to all my goals based on small thoughts (the bases for a strong foundation) to create a fulfilling life.

I had realized the is being able to see the truth for me is the first step, followed by acting or doing what that truth maybe and do what I need to do to make that happen in my life.  As you practice this more and attract more like minded people this should enable your confidence to grow and these people will still be with you as you continue to follow your paths.

This made my mind wonder to relationships - All relationships are different and as long as there is truth and kindness in your relationships that is all that matters  Based on this I realized I can not follow what I think is expected of me from what others think or what society thinks is normal.  Take what you observe around you in this regards and apply the parts that will work for you.  As all of our past experiences are vastly different, I am suggesting that because of this, no one specific way of life can you follow except for your own.....The direction that you have given yourself and this is a key way of achieving true happiness.....By doing this you will start to meet the most amazing people that area absolutely perfect for you in that moment of your reality.  When you are feeling emotional pain try to reservist your mind back to thoughts like these, reach out to the universe for strength and you will find your wish will be answered.  It will get better....

The movie I watched that day was called Hector and the search for happiness, staring Simon Pegg.  An incredible story that was mixed with all different kinds of emotions....if you are not looking for a deep meaning you will laugh and be entertained....If you are looking for some depth it will also provide that as well and leave you reflecting...

Also a song from the movie-----Jude in the mountains, created by Dan Mangan is also a very powerful song.

The 14th Chapter - Awareness and Being In-Sync With Others

Feb 28/16

I just arrived back from Hawaii after spending sometime on the island of Oahu.  This is the third time I have had the privilege to visit this beautiful island.  The weather and the people I met all were so beautiful.  With every visit I feel myself become more attached and my thoughts often drift back to those moments there.  One of these moments was a brief observation I experienced with the last visit.

While waiting to get off a bus I stood up and a I noticed a young woman was seating in the seat in front of me.  As I looked at her and made eye contact, I was preparing myself to wait until she went first, as we were all getting off the bus.  After she was stood  up from her seat, in a very formal manner, she bowed and said thank you and left.  For that brief moment her act and emotional energy were in perfect sync and I was grateful to feel in the moment.

Something so simple like these moments is the universe providing you strength (fuel) for you to go forward.  Also times like these are re-enforcement that you are on the path of your life that you have chosen for yourself.  Picture these brief moments of your internal compass pointing you in your direction that you need to go and be to truly have a fulfilled life.   Be mindful that if you start not having these experiences you maybe living in the past or spending too much time planning your future - this can be like a quiet warning light to you to start making choices that align up to what you truly want.

To have allowed myself to feel the impact of that moment helps me feel that life is truly worth living and is amazing.  I am truly grateful for what that woman gave to me, it was a moment that was completed in roughly 2 seconds, yet it still provides me with comfort and strength.  My wish is someday she will know how much that brief interaction has provided and to be able to thank her for what she did.

What a gift to be a human being and to be able to enjoy living.  To have the mindset of gratefulness and being truly open to others and yourself is another key of life's great journey and adventure.

Be mindful to not waste one precious moment of your life - those wasted moments will never be able to be recaptured other than in memory alone.

The 13th Chapter - Weight Loss Success Thought

Dec 3/15

I noticed weight loss programs in general will usually try to pitch their product with the thought that their program is "very easy" - So depending how you understand that term it can be read and interpretative  in two different ways.  Yes it is a easy process, if you follow the simple steps provided to you by the weight loss program - in theory yes you should be able to accomplish your goal.  However the biggest part of the component missing is the hardest to do and that is not as easy....and that is to reprogram your habits/brain of unhealthy actives that you may have been doing for years.  You are used to what you know and you will need a tangible tool to help you readjust your thoughts and habits.  These will need to change before you start on your weight gain goal....for as missing this critical step it will make your results that much harder to achieve....  Without this awareness there is a strong possibility that the results you seek may not become long term.

It will take a tremendous amount of courage to break out of your old habits and to have the desired change you want in your life.  Once the hard work has been done in realizing this fact then the foundation needs to be built before you start on any journey and then it will become easier.  Whether your goals are to lose weight or become healthier emotionally - all of the programs that you would like to follow, can be broke down into easy small bite size chucks which will allow you to start to form a new pattern.  Once you start achieving your small goals this pattern replication will become faster and faster and with sometime and practice it will actually become easier.  I am guessing you know where I am going with this next thought....like the person training for the marathon as discussed before - this pattern will need to be repeated in whatever venture you take on.

By doing this small steps to achieving your goals it will allow your brain to adjust and the rewiring of your thought patterns will happen.  Depending on your age and your up bringing, you have spent years perfecting whatever behavior it is that you would like to change.  So it will take the equal amount of effort to change that behavior...Keep in mind the time to take this will usually be shorter to rewire your brain as you now have self awareness and the power of intention on your side.  Usually the patterns of behavior that you would like to change have occurred so long ago and so slowly you might not even notice it has occurred....until self awareness is born in you.  Like the frog put in a pot with room temperature water will stay in it, as the stove is turned on and slowly raises the water temperature, the frog will stay there until its death.   Put the frog in already boiling water and it will jump out.

Take comfort in knowing what is going on and to why you have feelings of frustration as you might not think you are achieving your goals fast enough.  Take away the pressure on yourself to feel it should be so easy or others telling you it is easy - when your not aware of the reasons why.  Without first fixing your wheel of thought, it might be possible to head down a path of self doubt and a feeling of failure.  The irony is that when you started this journey of self improvement you were in a positive thought of energy is not in fact turned into the opposite.  Without this issue getting repaired the results could have your behavior turning out even worse then before you started.  That possible failure could be two fold as your not getting the change you originally set out to achieve, plus the additional stress of failure.

If this happens readdress and start asking yourself why this result has happened.  Be truthful to yourself on the answers you provide and with this answers self awareness will grow to why this unsuccessful event is occurring within you.  From there adjust your goal, to one that you know you can achieve and start to measure your accomplishments.

Remember it is OK to have failure and what is not OK is to not learn from these failures.

The 12th Chapter - A Moment of Reflection of Helping Others

Nov 19/15

Take a moment to think about a person that has helped you in some way.  Whether is is personal or work related and thank them.  Once a thank has been given (a thank can be of any form  - it does not need to be made in the physical sense) then carry on the energy and help that you have received and pay it forward, not only just saying it but how the experience made you feel.  To be sharing what has impacted you in a positive way - with a direction to that person - that if they felt that information and support was helpful then ask them to pay it forward with the same direction.  This is a tangible way to grow and foster a better community...Imagine the positive impact this would have in the world if the process were to be replicated only once a day by everyone in your community.  It would only take two people to start a conversation like this and it would spread with the true intent to help others and no financial gain to be the giver of this information.  This may sound too fairy type of a concept and not possible, however if we all could keep thoughts like this in a simple form, this would work and there would be possible change within our lives and our health of our communities.

Which now leads to the person I would like to thank.  This person has had and continues to have a positive impact on my life that continually keeps replicating.  As the positive interactions have grown - due to these interactions this has lead directly of me to putting pen to paper.  In fact I am writing/sharing this now in a book given to me by him.  As in chapter one - with the instructions to fill the pages.  As you know from chapter one, this person is Todd - Thank you Todd for the continued positive and self development experience you have helped create in me.  I am grateful of the risk he took in me to start helping me create a meaning full life.  A moment of reflection to explain that thought in more detail...When I first met Todd I had a very different mind set then I currently have now and did not realize how much of a truly negative state I was in.  In fact in that moment in time I did believe I was in a good mind set and had a thought that if only all the others around me could see it....things would just be so easy and the problem of my current struggles were because others around me were the problem....Holy moly is this thinking painful for me or so painful for the people around me that could see it....but I did not.  I truly did think I was doing everything  right and I was not the problem....as I continue to reflect what an incredible waste of people's most precious gift - time.  It was true at that time in my career I did have a large workload and yes I was striving for excellence....but I never fully communicated to others nor did I let myself show any kind of vulnerability - which added to an environment that did not build trust to those around me.  For some reason Todd was able to see through my current state of chaos I was in and invested his time and energy in providing me a way to see things differently....

And as promised Todd - this chapter is dedicated to you and I truly thank you for your belief in me and never laying out judgement or giving up in me.  I will also continue to pass this message to anyone that will hear it and hope others will find it helpful.  For those of you that are truly looking for a different perspective to living - try to find balance in this life no matter where you are right now as you read these words.  I can actually picture these words coming out in print as the thoughts continue to come to mind and transit to paper.  All of us strive for greatness and this is possible by one thought and one conversation at a time of you setting your life.  Thank you for giving me the courage to present my thoughts and ideas that all of human kind has know for thousands of years and I hope those of you reading this - feel the gift of your time to ingest these pages have created a positive impact and has benefited you in some form.

As your time and feelings are truly the thing that should matter the most to you.

The Eleventh Chapter - Find Your Bread Crumbs

Nov 6/15

Are you ever searching for possible signs for life's break crumbs to help determine if your on the correct track for you?  I have read a lot of self help/motivational type books and there is a lot of information on providing guidance of next steps in your life and I hope this concept will be useful as well to you.

So take the things that you experience, whether it is a movie or an interest and after some time has passed, say about a month or more, that experience you had you can remember in detail and feel the positive affirmation from it.....This is a reference to life's bread crumbs leading you to your next step and reaffirming you are on the correct track.

I remember years ago watching just a small part of the original Rocky movie...This was the scene where he was running in a park like place.....It was cooler out and he had a tuque on, dressed in work out gear for colder weather....Just yesterday I was running in a park with colder weather (I am running in western Canada so the water of the lakes is starting to freeze)...In a brief moment I was flooded with the memory of that movie scene....I then experienced a moment of realization of I am on the correct pathway of life and this was followed rapidly with joy.....This joy created a surge of energy that enabled me to run even faster and provided such a fulfilling feeling.....To me it felt the universe was providing all of what I truly needed or wanted for that moment in time....The importance of living in the present is paramount....To not focus on the now, moments like these I have missed in the past and I have missed the fuel to go forward emotionally....

Part of the secret is to quiet our minds and recognize when opportunities come across our paths...What we focus on we we receive....Joy/fulfilled thoughts will create that reality in you....Never settle with your current personal development or career goals...Always strive for growth and be aware that not everyday will be easy but with the replication of a positive pattern  put into your daily routine....These pattern traits, after a while, will translate into your path of success and you will receive what your truly putting out to the universe.

Take a moment...look around your current surroundings...What comes to you in regards to thoughts?  Are these thoughts in alignment to what you truly want in your life?  Can you feel the present in time right now?  If your thoughts are not in alignment to what you want - after this realization has occurred - actively change your thoughts to what you truly would like to receive into your life...This is going to take time, if you find yourself stuck in a negative wheel of thought loop...Habit forming, whether positive or negative, will take time and mental energy.....The building blocks of any large amazing structure are usually very strong, deliberately placed to support the weight and are small in size however a very important piece to that structure....This pattern is true to your internal thoughts as well....so small in relation to you as a person....yet so vital in creating what you truly want to experience out of life.....

The Tenth Chapter - Develop and Live Your Dreams

Nov 2/15

Hopes, dreams and aspirations and putting all those thoughts into your wheel of thoughts that will lead to you creating energy and forward actions as well as actual meaningful personal self fulfillment.  Over time people have tried to find purpose and self fulfillment through all different kinds of methods...Things such as religion, helping others or acts of selflessness or more personal harmful ways of self medication of some form....At the end of the day all of these forms will be difficult ways to help you achieve self fulfillment, in fact actually will slow down your personal growth and mask the true growth or insight that needs to be developed in you by you....I am not suggesting that any of the above things are bad for you or you should not do these kind things for others....In fact to do kind things for others should be something all of us should strive to do...The point is to not confuse what you are trying to do in your life.....Doing good things for others and your self development are two different things and are equally as important.... Unfortunately there is not an easy  fix or acts of good deeds or pills or any kind to achieve this and ultimately it will be up to you to grow your own self awareness....Based on this thought you have to actively try hard and put effort into your self fulfillment....

Take a what appears to be a random experience or people that you bump into appears to be random... However in reality these events are probably the universe providing you for what you are actually seeking....It is up to you to act and understand these event in your life that are currently happening.  From that starting point put plans in place to create a reality of self fulfillment....Read books as well, of the topics/content that you seek to add into your life...Always be humble and you never know when the most amazing gift will come to you and usually it is when you least expect it to appear...Put process into your life, study a successful person or business...Find out how they interpreted the data of challenges and created successes...Like you all these people you admire have the same challenges as you are right now.....Sometimes we will think that we are so different and our challenges are not like anyone else....Yes on the surface that is correct however the driving force of the energy of yours, mine and others experiences are all the same....When we get up in the morning....all of us have the same amount of mental energy that is ours to use as we choose....The difference in people is how we use this energy....What are we looking at doing with this energy?  Trying to create good all around us or the opposite?  Whatever we decide to do with this energy will then create a field around us...that will either attract great things towards us...Or not...Like Yoda has said...."do or do not, there is no try"...Once we have used this energy fuel, picture a car that once had a full tank of gas and now is empty, this is true with our mental fuel....Its up to us to decide and reflect...Did I use this gas to what I truly want?  or not?  Did I add to my day and others around me?  What did I bring into my life today?  Based on that how do I feel right now?  Use those feelings to help determine how your are going to use your full tank of mental energy tomorrow...

When you start finding yourself in a state of not having enough time to do what you want to do in your day....This is a form of validation that your on your correct path...Life should be full and fulfilling on whatever you do and should not be filled with large periods of boredom...If you find yourself in a state of boredom you might be making mistakes and wasting your precious time...It is up to you to make changes and fill that boredom with tangle tools to reach your person fulfillment.

The Ninth Chapter - Being True to Yourself - Grow Your Confidence

Oct 29/15

Being true to yourself and have the confidence to be that person.  To often our thoughts will turn negative and when we have a great idea or want to do something new, we feel even before we start, our thoughts and focus our shift on how we can't do this new great thing or follow up on a new idea....Once again our fear come into play and it will tell us ...What if you fail?  However more importantly the question in our mind should be.. What if you succeed?  Now what?  Usually we are not used to actually thinking that we can do great things...and from there receiving results...Too often it is so easy to keep what we know to be our "normal"....and trying to come up with ways of not being able to do what we truly want to do.....Spend a moment and reflect, mediate to the impact to that positive thought and what it actually could mean to you.  You, yes you, if you truly believe it - you can do whatever you want or become...Whether it is to become a world leader or visionary of some kind of positive change in your life....whatever it is you want...it will be...Be true to you and others will have no power to take you off your path that you have chosen for you....This path is yours and yours along and no one has the power to change that path.....If you give people the power or listen to the impact of negative words this will result in you giving up your control of your life....You are writing the pages of your life's story....no one will chose for you if it will be successful or not...Successful people do not live a life with a single thought of "I can't do it" thoughts at all and they live a life of an example of successful people that meet challenges head on and will create opportunities of those challenges...Which will lead to another part of their on-going success...Keep in mind it does take hard work and dedication for the success you seek, however it is truly up to you to make it happen...Keep your thoughts and goals simple, break them down into small bite size pieces that are possible to accomplish......Picture the fact you have decided yo want to run a full marathon...You are 40 years old and up to this point you have not ran any kind of race singe high school days, nor do you go to the gym during that time.....Find a beginners guide to accomplishing your goal and focus on one day at a time...Visualize that it is a journey to get to the ultimate goal of running that marathon...Use patterns to program your brain for success and break your goals into steps 1, 2 and 3.... From there drill them down very simple to a physical level that you can achieve that day and a measurable component put into your day each day to measure your success....

It is possible - all of your thoughts and wants, needs - Its up to you.....

The Eighth Chapter - Steps Process to Your Growth and Development

Oct 22/2015

True growth and development is very easy and is a step by step process.  The only reason why growth will not happen is if we chose it not to....All successes come from hard work, determination and being motivated  to truly become our greatest..  Our past development years of a child is usually an environment of "no you can't do that Johnny or no that is wrong or that is not possible" this type of feedback results in such a narrow scope of what our reality and normalcy becomes and directly impacts to a lower level of what we end up achieving in our life.  The power of what we believe is what we become.  So these pivotal moments when our minds are so young, full of the possibility that anything is possible (and require positive reinforcement )we receive the opposite - probably poor communication from a parent or teacher type figure.... We all know we can not change the past however with being able to understand and identify with this pattern we can do two things.  First is more of a understanding to who we are and why we have become what we are.  This will allow us to make concrete changes of growth.  This is not the magic pill we all seek for greatness however it is another component to keep rebuilding our requirement for a strong foundation of our emotional well being.   The second part to this awareness of our childhood and the impact of communication is - the next time you hear a young child speak or act in a why that is different - remember back when you were that child....How did you feel at the moment when you were sharing yourself with an adult?  What kind of response did you get back from that adult?  And in general as you were so young and developing what was the average outcomes of those communication moments?  Based on that - how will you interact when you have that next conversation?  Will you take the time needed to encourage growth and development?  There will be times as well that you may need to gently redirect young minds if they are totally off track.... Yes that will happen as they are still learning how to emotional grow and express.... The same pattern can be observed in learning to walk as a young child and like the marathon runner it is easy to see the results of walking or the end of the race around the corner.... The difference with emotional growth is it is not as tangle as an outsider looking on to someone....There also is a chance that you may not be able to fill the need in these situations.....that is totally normal....all you need to do is be honest and say I am not sure and direct them to someone else.....The importance of taking the time with someone needs something and to be completely honest is key!!!  Remember words are so powerful....so when you have to be honest and it might impact or take away from someone else's energy...be kind with your words.

Keep in mind I am not saying these adult type people that may have had a negative impact in your childhood development are bad people.....In fact I believe totally the opposite the vast majority of these people are good people and are doing the best of the limited teaching they themselves had....The patterns of behavior repeat and repeat.....As this pattern repeats - I have observed it seems to be based on fear of failure and sometimes causes us to live a life where we are not able to live up to our full potential.....as sensitive beings and as we all try to become stronger it is up to all of us to be aware of this and makes changes going forward....   Not only in our day to day life but to share these ideas with others with the goal to truly make a difference.....That may sound so clique but once again it really is that simple...

The wheel of thought was recently introduce to me and I found it so powerful in regards to able to make effective  decisions and understand the emotions caused by them.. As the result of our emotions humans will react in totally different outcomes due to several different facts...These could be past experience or even something as simple as the current emotion felt will change an outcome that a person would normally never do....The value in the thought wheel is - try to visualize a computer you input data and based on set programmed parameters you then receive an output...So in us this process starts with some kind of stimulation/communication that impacts one of your five senses....from that moment a thought in you has now been created and based on your current emotions and past experiences your thought will create emotion.  From that emotion that leads to an action which is your output back to whatever one of your fives senses were just stimulated.....So it does not matter what your stimulation is, you and only you have the power to create your reality of what will happen next....Do you want positive growth in your life?  Do you want success?  Do you want conflict?  It is that simple, to use this thought above to start making intimidate positive change, and you don't need to spend years trying to understand the human psychology to achieve positive results in your life..

Key important facts for a healthy mid set is to keep everything you do in regards to your thoughts simple and keep to what you know and is true....Avoid at all cost - conjecture and assumptions of what other people may do or may have done or may feel within your intimate circle of friends or in your partner...Engage in actively listening, put your thoughts on hold and give the greatest gift you can to anyone - (time) is your uninterrupted and undivided  attention for that brief moment,... Time is truly the greatest gift one can give another and when that happens please have full grace and acknowledge of that persons time....For in that moment and acting with this premise of being true will lead to all of what you seek and strive for in life to you.  What you believe and you know to be true is the only thing that matters and the fact is "Johnny" - sometimes your behavior might not been appropriate on your output but your thought is always right...That is yours and no one else as long as this thought is based on what you know is right and true.

Write down what you want to achieve and when life is moving on, keep acting back to what you have wrote down.....Do some research of a success story and learn from that story....There is a very good chance that success story was built on a clear concept of what that person/group wanted to achieve....From that clear concept the energy starts to build, keep in mind that you will have to make adjustments along the way, as external factors will come in to play, however by staying aligned to what you truly want - you will get it!!