Monday, 21 April 2025

Faith in the Waiting: A Reflection from One Christian Single to Another

Faith in the Waiting: A Reflection from One Christian Single to Another


As you read this, are you single?
Because as I write this—I am, too.

And if that matters to you, then we’re starting in the same place, and that place is often a quiet one. Sometimes it's full of longing, sometimes full of peace. Sometimes, honestly, it's full of questions that sound like echoes in a canyon—no one else around to hear, but somehow they still come back to you, louder than when you asked them.

This might hit home.

Because this isn’t a story about loneliness or discouragement—though both have visited me more than once. This is a story about faith. About choosing to trust God not just with our salvation, but with our everyday walk—including who we walk beside.

Let me tell you what happened just the other day.


Online Dating and Faith Collide

Like many Christian singles in this modern era, I’ve tried dating sites. I've been on and off them over the years—long enough to know how they work, short enough to know they don’t work for me. That might surprise you. You might be thinking, “Wait, isn’t it better than nothing?” or “Well, I know a friend of a friend who met their spouse that way…”

And you’re not wrong.

Online dating can work. I've met some genuinely kind, respectful, and God-loving people through those apps. People trying their best, just like me, to navigate the wilderness of Christian singleness in a swipe-left, swipe-right world. But in all that, I never found what I now believe is a God-ordained relationship. Something holy. Something unmistakably touched by the Spirit.

Call it a hunch. Call it a prompting. Call it the whisper of the Holy Spirit.

It’s like trying to listen to a song on the radio that’s not quite tuned in. You can make out the melody, the rhythm is nice, but something’s off. The crackle in the background doesn’t go away. I’ve felt that crackle in every connection I’ve made online.

Until this past weekend.


A Moment at the Table

On Good Friday, my church held a special Easter communion service. I sat somewhere in the middle section, two rows behind my usual spot. You know us church folks—we’ve got our unofficial assigned seats.

When it was time to take the bread and wine, I walked forward, picked up the elements, and began to walk back to my seat. That’s when I saw her. A blonde woman, radiant—not because of some physical glow, but because of something so much deeper. The Holy Spirit was evident in her. Tangible. Alive.

We met halfway in the aisle. A brief smile. A holy pause. No words were spoken, but the recognition was there. I’ve seen her before in passing—nothing more than a glance or a nod. But this moment was different. It wasn’t awkward. It wasn’t orchestrated. It wasn’t convenient.

It was right.

Then again, on Easter Sunday, it happened once more. I was walking down the hallway before service, and she came around a corner. Face to face. A quick hello. A shared smile. Again, that same feeling. It wasn't about me. It wasn't even about her. It was about the presence of something greater—someone greater.

God was there.

That’s when it hit me.


Faith That Walks with You

I went home that afternoon, still lingering in the warmth of that moment. And something inside whispered:

“This is what a God-ordained relationship feels like.”

Not forced.
Not filtered.
Not based on a profile bio or ten perfect photos.

Just presence. Holy presence.

Later that night, I logged into my dating profile and deleted it.

Why?

Because the same God I trust with my eternity—the same Savior I’ve placed my entire soul in the hands of—surely He can be trusted with my love life.

We sing about it in church, don’t we?
🎶 “I surrender all...” 🎶

But then we go home and swipe.
We say, “God, take the wheel,” but we never let go of the steering wheel in our love lives.

It was in that moment that I realized:
Faith must be practiced in all areas of life—especially the ones we’re most tempted to control ourselves.


Three Ways to Strengthen Faith as a Christian Single

1. Reframe Singleness as a Season of Preparation, Not Purgatory

There’s a lie out there that singleness is a spiritual waiting room—where God has forgotten your number and you’re flipping through outdated magazines waiting for your “someone” to arrive.

Don’t believe it.

The truth?
This season isn’t punishment. It’s preparation.

God is shaping you, not shelving you.

We see this all throughout Scripture.
Think of Joseph—years in prison, forgotten, before stepping into his God-ordained role.
Think of Ruth—faithful in the field before she ever met Boaz.
Think of Jesus Himself—30 years of ordinary before 3 years of ministry that would change the world.

Let God use this time to refine you. Learn to be content—not complacent—but content in who you are and where you are. The right relationship will never complete you. Only Jesus does that.

“But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.” – Matthew 6:33 (NKJV)

2. Pursue God as if He Were the Only Relationship You’ll Ever Have

Let that one sit for a moment.

We often pursue God with the hope of receiving a spouse.
But what if we pursued Him with no other expectation than to be near Him?

When your heart shifts from “God, send someone” to “God, be with me,” that’s when your faith matures.

David wrote in Psalm 27:4,

“One thing I ask from the Lord, this only do I seek:
that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life,
to gaze on the beauty of the Lord and to seek him in his temple.”

That’s the goal. To chase after Jesus not because He can lead you to someone else—but because He is the someone your soul needs most.

If a partner comes along, they’re an added blessing, not a replacement for God.

3. Let Peace Be the Ruler of Your Heart

Colossians 3:15 says,

“Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts…”

That word “rule” comes from the same idea as an umpire—someone who decides what is safe and what is out.

If peace is absent, that’s your sign.
If peace is present, that’s your path.

Relationships not ordained by God will always carry a certain unease.
Relationships guided by God? Even in uncertainty, there is peace.

That’s what I felt when I met that woman at church.
Not nerves. Not butterflies.
Just peace.


Where Do We Go From Here?

You might be reading this still with your dating profile active—and that's okay. I'm not writing this to shame you or tell you what to do. I’m simply sharing my own walk, one step of faith at a time.

This is not a declaration that dating apps are wrong.
This is a declaration that faith in God should be our first app opened every morning.

I don’t know what happens next with that woman from Easter.
Maybe it was just a fleeting holy moment.
Maybe it was a seed planted for something more.
Maybe I’ll never know this side of heaven.

But I do know this:

I felt God in that moment.
And that feeling outweighed every online connection I’ve ever had.

So I closed the app.
I surrendered that part of my life—finally, fully.


A Final Word for the Single Heart

If you’re like me, you’ve had seasons where you wonder if something’s wrong with you.
If you’re ever going to meet someone.
If you’re ever going to feel chosen. Wanted. Loved.

Let me remind you:

You are already chosen.
You are already wanted.
You are already loved.

“I have loved you with an everlasting love;
I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.” – Jeremiah 31:3

God doesn’t dangle a relationship over your head like a carrot.
He leads you like a Shepherd. With grace. With patience. With purpose.

And maybe the greatest act of faith in this season isn’t waiting for the right person—
but becoming the right person.
Becoming someone so deeply rooted in Christ, that anyone who wants to get close to you has to go through Him first.

And maybe… just maybe… the holy moment you experience next will be the beginning of the rest of your story.


To all my fellow Christian singles:

I see you.
I understand you.
I am you.

May you walk in peace, not pressure.
May you wait in joy, not judgment.
And may your faith grow stronger than your fear of being alone.

Because you are never truly alone.
Jesus is with you, beside you, before you.

And He knows exactly who you need—if anyone—on the journey ahead.

P.S. If this message encouraged you, I ask only this: continue to seek God first. Your heart matters—and I’m walking beside you in prayer, one step at a time.

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