Why Was Mary So Special to Jesus? A Deep Dive Into Devotion, Honor, and the Message We’re Meant to Carry
There’s something about Mary.
Not just any Mary—Mary of Bethany.
We often read the gospels and get swept up in the miracles, the parables, the conflict with religious leaders, and the climactic sacrifice of Jesus on the cross. But hidden in plain sight, wrapped in a quiet intimacy, is a sacred story between Jesus and one woman that shakes the ground beneath religious performance and invites us into something deeper.
Why was Mary so special to Jesus?
Not because she was perfect. Not because she was famous. Not because she had influence or wealth.
But because she understood Him.
Because while others surrounded Him to be taught, healed, or fed—Mary simply sat at His feet.
She chose presence over performance. She chose relationship over religion. She chose worship over worry.
And Jesus noticed.
Let’s walk through Scripture and see the heart of this woman—and even more, the heart of Jesus towards her. Let’s unpack the powerful message He was trying to teach us through Mary, and then close with three deep, practical ways we can be more like Jesus today, through the lens of this holy friendship.
Part 1: Mary of Bethany in the Scriptures
Mary is mentioned three times in the gospels—in three different but deeply connected stories. And each one draws us deeper into her heart and her significance to Jesus.
1. Mary at Jesus’ Feet – Luke 10:38-42
"...she had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said." (Luke 10:39)
This is the first encounter. Jesus comes to the home of Mary, Martha, and Lazarus. Martha, ever the hostess, is busy making preparations. But Mary? She chooses the posture of a disciple.
She sits. She listens. She rests in the presence of the Word made flesh.
This was radical. In a time when women weren’t welcomed in rabbinical teaching spaces, Mary sat in the position of a disciple at the feet of a Rabbi.
And Jesus doesn’t correct her. He defends her.
"Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her." (Luke 10:42)
This wasn’t about household duties. This was a rebuke to religious systems that prioritized activity over intimacy.
Jesus wasn’t dismissing Martha’s service. He was highlighting Mary’s priority.
Mary saw what others missed: that Jesus wasn’t there just to be accommodated—He was there to be adored.
2. Mary at the Tomb of Lazarus – John 11:28-35
The next scene is soaked in grief. Lazarus is dead.
Mary and Martha send for Jesus, but He doesn’t arrive in time—at least, not according to their timeline.
When Martha goes to meet Him, she holds a theological conversation about resurrection.
But when Mary comes?
"When Mary reached the place where Jesus was and saw him, she fell at his feet and said, 'Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.'" (John 11:32)
She doesn’t preach. She doesn’t pretend. She weeps.
And again, she’s at His feet.
And this time? Jesus weeps with her.
"When Jesus saw her weeping... he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled... Jesus wept." (John 11:33, 35)
This is the only place in all of Scripture where we see Jesus weep in this way.
Why?
Because Mary’s heart touched His heart. She brought no agenda—only honesty. Her pain moved Him. Her tears pulled from Him a divine empathy that changed the atmosphere.
Mary didn’t try to control the outcome. She just brought her brokenness to the feet of Jesus—and He met her in it.
3. Mary Anoints Jesus – John 12:1-8 / Mark 14:3-9
This is the climax of her story. Days before Jesus’ crucifixion, He returns again to Bethany.
And Mary does something that shocks the room:
"Then Mary took about a pint of pure nard, an expensive perfume; she poured it on Jesus’ feet and wiped his feet with her hair." (John 12:3)
She breaks a costly jar of perfume—worth a year’s wages—and anoints Him for burial.
She does this before the cross. Before the resurrection. Before anyone else understood.
Mary saw what others couldn’t. She understood what was about to happen.
While the disciples were still arguing about greatness, Mary was preparing Jesus for the grave.
Jesus responds:
"Leave her alone... She has done a beautiful thing to me... Truly I tell you, wherever the gospel is preached throughout the world, what she has done will also be told, in memory of her." (Mark 14:6, 9)
Let that sink in.
Jesus said that Mary’s act of worship would be remembered wherever the gospel is preached.
That means her story isn’t just a side note. It’s part of the gospel itself.
Her worship mattered that much.
Part 2: Why Was She So Special to Jesus?
So why Mary?
Why this woman, in this way, with this honor?
Because Mary saw Jesus not just as a miracle worker, or a wise teacher, or a religious leader.
She saw Him as worthy.
And her love wasn’t contingent on what He could do for her. It was rooted in who He was.
She didn’t serve to be seen. She didn’t worship for applause. She didn’t follow for position.
She simply loved Him.
In a world full of striving, Mary chose stillness. In a culture obsessed with outward success, Mary cultivated inner surrender.
And Jesus noticed. He still does.
"The eyes of the Lord range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him." (2 Chronicles 16:9)
Mary was that heart. And through her, Jesus taught us what true devotion looks like.
Part 3: What Was Jesus Teaching Us Through Mary?
Mary’s story wasn’t recorded just to honor her. It was written to teach us.
To reorient our priorities. To reframe what matters. To redefine what greatness in the Kingdom really looks like.
Jesus wasn’t just affirming Mary. He was giving us a blueprint for discipleship.
Let’s break it down into three simple—but profoundly challenging—takeaways:
Three Teachings to Be More Like Jesus (Through the Lens of Mary)
1. Value Presence Over Performance
The world applauds hustle. Heaven honors stillness.
Mary chose to sit.
She didn’t earn her seat.
She didn’t wait until she had the right credentials.
She just wanted to be close to Jesus.
And Jesus said:
"Mary has chosen what is better." (Luke 10:42)
Being with Him is the better thing. Always.
We don’t serve to earn love.
We serve because we are loved.
Sit with Him.
Speak less. Listen more.
Let your time with Jesus reshape your soul.
2. Bring Him Your Brokenness, Not Just Your Best
Mary didn’t hide her grief at Lazarus’ death. She fell at His feet and cried.
And what did Jesus do? He wept with her.
You don’t have to have it all together to come to Jesus.
He’s not waiting for your perfection.
He’s inviting your pain.
He is near to the brokenhearted (Psalm 34:18).
Come undone in His presence.
He can handle your sorrow.
He can carry your questions.
He meets you in the middle of your mess—not just your victories.
3. Worship Boldly and Without Regret
Mary’s most controversial act was her most prophetic. She anointed Jesus with costly perfume. She gave what others thought was too much. She wept. She worshiped. She wiped His feet with her hair.
And the room judged her. But Jesus honored her.
This is what it means to be holy spent. To give without measure. To love without fear. To worship in such a way that the fragrance of it lingers long after you’ve left the room.
"Wherever the gospel is preached... what she has done will be told." (Mark 14:9)
You were made to love like that. To live like that. To give yourself fully to the One who gave Himself for you.
Final Thoughts: You Are Invited
Mary wasn’t special because she had some divine advantage. She was special because she said yes to the invitation.
And so are you.
You are invited to sit. You are invited to weep. You are invited to pour. You are invited to live a life of quiet, radical, extravagant love.
Be like Mary. Be like Jesus. Be holy. Be spent. And never forget—He notices.
"She has done a beautiful thing to me..."
Let your life be that beautiful thing. Let your worship become your witness. Let your story, like Mary’s, be remembered wherever the gospel is preached.
Amen.
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